by A mother of four has sparked widespread debate online after revealing her unconventional promise: she’ll give each of her daughters $35,000 if they choose not to have a wedding.
In a viral TikTok video, the mom — identified as Kate — shared that her offer isn’t about opposing marriage itself, but rather about pushing back against the growing culture of overspending on elaborate ceremonies. Her logic? The money could be put to far better use than a one-day celebration.
Why She’s Offering $35,000 Instead of a Wedding
Kate explained that she and her husband once had a “big fancy poofy wedding,” complete with all the trimmings — and the financial burden that followed.
“If they choose not to have a wedding, they will get a check,” she said in her video. “And the reason I’m going to do that is because most married couples start off their marriage in debt.”
After their lavish wedding, Kate said the couple spent five years paying off the costs, which they now view as a financial mistake. Looking back, she wishes they’d used the money more wisely — perhaps toward a down payment on a house, a honeymoon, or a retirement fund.
A Change in Perspective
While Kate admits the wedding was beautiful, she also calls it “a huge waste of money.”
“It was a beautiful day, it was a great wedding. But the cost of it was exorbitant,” she explained. “That would have been a better start for us. That would have taken a lot of the pressure off the first few years of our marriage.”
Her hope is that her daughters take that lesson to heart. By offering $35,000, she’s essentially giving them the freedom to choose between a one-day event or long-term financial stability.
The Reality of Wedding Costs in 2025
Kate’s reasoning is backed by recent data. According to a February 2025 report from Brides.com, the average cost of a wedding — including receptions and related celebrations — now ranges between $31,000 and $36,000, with more than half of couples going over budget.
Wedding costs have been steadily increasing over the past decade, driven by higher venue prices, catering expenses, and post-pandemic “wedding boom” trends.
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Not Anti-Marriage — Just Pro-Smart Choices
Kate emphasizes that she isn’t discouraging marriage itself — only the financial strain that often comes with it.
“My daughters know my heart on the matter,” she said. “If they decide to have a big wedding, I’ll still be supportive and help with the costs. But if they don’t, they’ll get that check.”
The offer has sparked mixed reactions online. Some users praised her for prioritizing financial independence and realism over tradition, while others argued that weddings are about memories, not money.
Still, Kate’s message resonates with many young couples reconsidering the value of extravagant weddings amid rising living costs and economic uncertainty.
As she put it plainly in her video:
“Most people don’t need a big wedding to start a great marriage — they need a great foundation.”
Would you take $35,000 over a dream wedding? Share your thoughts at race-day-live.com.
